Thursday, May 2, 2013

Tiredness

This past week was the 11 month anniversary of my brother's suicide.  Grief affects the body in a way that's hard to fully explain.  Some days I'd wake up and physically/emotionally not have much to give that day.  This past week was one of those weeks where every day felt like that.

I decided on Sunday that I was going to try to work through it anyway and create something.  These aren't my favorite photos, but this shoot was more about working through the tired-rut than the outcome of the photos.

(click image for correct size).




9 comments:

  1. Dear ester your photos are beautiful! My husbands brother committed subside years before I met and married my husband... But I still see him deal with it. My prayers and thoughts are with you!

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  2. Esther, your thoughtful words and pictures are such an inspiration to me. I am so glad to see that your faith is in God and I pray that you find comfort in His grace. Thank you for the inspiration and keep up the good work.

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  3. Esther, you are to be commended to trying to work through the pain caused by your grief. And while you may not see the beauty in what you created because you don't think it was about doing your best work, trust me when I tell you that others do. Grief completely depletes us and every day is a struggle. I'm four months behind you on the journey, creativity sure does help. Love to your family.

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  4. It is completely okay and normal to feel this way, and I think you are dealing with it in a very positive way. These kind of feelings will stay with you forever from now on, but trust me when I say the edges wear off a bit with time. Just remember to stay close to the people around you, and try to keep seeing the beauty in life!

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  5. Esther, Grief is handled in whatever way works for you. My husband passed away a few years ago and each year is always a challenge,sometimes during that time I do or don't do think that people do or do not expect. I can't imagine your pain but I know my own pain and I know we all cope differently.
    Hugs to you and your family.

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  6. Hi Esther. Ever since you first wrote on this blog about your brother's suicide, and made that music video for him, this song has reminded me of you: http://youtu.be/sc0GsJfAFpI

    Hugs.

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  7. I've been reading your blog for a long time, and I've seen you dealing with this for a long time. It made me sad for you and I couldn't even imagine what it was like. Then three months ago I found out exactly what it was like. It's so hard and no words can describe it, but I'm so glad you found yourself able to blog about it. It's nice to have someone to identify with. Maybe one day I'll find the courage to talk about it on my blog too.

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  8. I can feel the emotional intensity in these photos and I admire you greatly to create something this beautiful out of something as horrific as the death of a near one. You're a brave person, and a magnificent artist.

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  9. awesome pics!

    breepluse.blogspot.com

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